Dear Amy: The #SMEtiquette of LinkedIn Requests from Co-Workers

Look, everyone uses social media sites differently. We should respect that. I never really understand when people get offended by being unfriended or unfollowed or by getting a request from someone they didn't want to get a request from. This was an interesting issue, and it all comes down to the fact that we should respect how people choose to use these platforms: Otherwise, how can we expect people to respect how we use them ourselves?Submit your questions.

Dear Amy:I started a new job last week, and a couple days in got a LinkedIn connection request from someone in my department. I don’t know this person and we don’t really work together on a daily basis. How can I turn it down without being rude? Or should I just accept the request?Sincerely,Leery About LinkedIn

Dear Leery:Everyone uses her LinkedIn account differently. I know people who – gasp! – only connect to those people with whom they’ve actually worked. Because of that, however, I know if this person recommends someone on LinkedIn, I can take that recommendation to the bank.Most people don’t use LinkedIn that way. And you need to look at how you’ve been connecting with people before rejecting a request from a co-worker.It’s a lot easier with Facebook, oddly enough, because there you can create lists that separate your work and your “real” life and segment your co-workers to a small portion of your feed. On LinkedIn, however, it’s all or nothing.That said, you never know when having this co-worker as a connection may pay off for you. It’s unlikely you’re sharing personal details of your life on LinkedIn, so it’s not as if you’re giving this person an inside look at your world by granting the connection request.I can’t tell you whether or not to accept the request – that’s something you truly have to decide yourself. Consider whether accepting it would cause any harm to you. Most likely, the answer is no, though you don’t really know this person yet. It may be useful for you in the long run. And, after all, LinkedIn is the place where you connect with co-workers and business acquaintances.Better you get the request there than on Facebook, no?If you’re still uncomfortable, your best bet for the short term is to keep the request in limbo – not rejecting it, but not accepting it yet. If she asks you why you haven’t accepted it, be honest. “I don’t generally accept requests immediately and like to get to know people better before doing so.”